Not ready for a kid? Here’s what our ancestors did…
EPT test says everything’s a go
But you are sweating, Oh No! Whoa!
Who hasn’t heard this scenario…
Help, I think I got my girlfriend pregnant.
Ok 14-24m/f, don’t explode or melt down just yet. You have all the tools you need to solve the problem without hitting the panic button.
Our ancestors used an “easy button” method that I will explain herein. It takes about ten completely painless seconds if you know your body (or your partner’s body) the way you should.
Whether you are male or female, I’d like you to refer to the posted letter Dr.B and My Ovary.
Gee, unless you plan to repeat the pregnancy scare episode again in this lifetime, consider the option to blow a load in something you can wash down the drain or take with you in the future. I think that concept just made the “more important” list? (There’s a letter about this, too!)
She didn’t want to take a morning after pill?
Not interested in the stigma or expense of an abortion?
Is this some type of weaponized sex? (Another letter to read) An attempt to lock you down for life?
I know… we need to deal with the issue at hand… or in the vagina so to speak.
Besides the obvious panic syndrome, doctor visit, morality lectures, Bible thumping and un-planned parenthood options, did you know that your index finger can remove the newly forming growth on a uterine wall?
Years after I had been taught to internally check myself; I ran, angrily crashing, into Dr.B’s office for an unexpected visit. My then Hamptons boyfriend has roofed me and knocked me up when I was passed out after I told him I didn’t want to get married. Have a baby by me baby and you’ll be a millionaire may be great song lyrics but this wasn’t how I wanted to bring a child into the world.
After calming me down, Dr.B explained that I already had the skills to “remove my problems.”
In addition to Dr.B teaching me how to reach my own ovary from the inside, he also gave me a quick lesson in how to lightly swipe off something I didn’t want to carry around on the inside. This won’t work with warts but it will solve an unwanted pregnancy situation.
Lightly is the key. No digging required. It takes a gentle well-placed brush of a finger to remove a pin- head sized fetus. In fact, it takes more pressure to slide on a contact lens than to remove an early stage mouth to feed.
This method only works in the first month or so. After that time period has elapsed, the embryo has gotten a pretty good attachment to the wall.
If you’ve waited past the first trimester to decide you are not ready to bring new life into the world, I’d suggest making other arrangements than attempting a d&c with a coat hangar. (If this is a foreign concept, Google this as it was the malicious behavior that ushered in our current abortion allowance laws.)
The whole point of doing the finger trick in ten seconds or less is about not getting aroused.
You want the shortest path between the outside environment and the object for removal. Male and female sex organs originated from the same basic material. It is logical to understand that human body parts have some flexibility and stretching ability.
When women are not aroused, the vaginal canal contracts to around 3” in length (just like a male penis). When the canal is short, a finger that knows where it is going can reach past a cervix in no-time flat.
If the finger knows what feels normal and what doesn’t… the job of removing a nodule roughly the size of a grain of sand just got super easy.
But what if you don’t know what I just said you should know… no time like the present to learn.
Is ignorance really blissful at this moment?
Sadly, horny is not helpful in this situation other than to learn your girl’s moves and grooves. Once you know the “lay of the land” wait until nobody is aroused to attempt the ten second finger removal trick.
You do know how to finger you or your girlfriend to get her off… right?
If not, it only takes one or two fingers to do this well.
After stimulating the clitoris, when she gets noticeably wet, you may begin to insert a finger. To do this deftly, take a page from nature… watch an inchworm inspect it’s surroundings. Pretend your finger is an inchworm.
It goes in a little bit and wiggles around to check out its surroundings… your finger mimics the inchworm behavior by rolling your finger in a clockwise and/or counterclockwise motion to get a feel for the cave you are entering.
Go a little deeper… only to acceptance. You will know if what is being penetrated likes it, as her back will arch a little more, legs will spread a little wider, the wet will get a little wetter, breathing and heart rate change, and so on.
If you are asked to put two fingers inside… same entry procedure with optional scissors, finger can-can dancing, creative finger exercises alternating fingers and add a twist every so often for some surprise fun.
You only have to get to knuckle deep to get to an ovary… and that is too far for what you are looking for.
There is a definite difference in feel between the vaginal walls, the cervix and the uterine walls. Each area has its own distinct brand of wallpaper.
Granted, most guys have no idea what they are doing. They try to shove as many fingers as possible into the orifice in an attempt to make her feel “filled” which isn’t the way to solve this problem.
No finger snapping inside the vaginal canal nor punishing rapid penetration is going to be your friend in this situation.
Pretend her box is your cell phone and tap fifty one-finger Twitter posts on the proposed path to success. You gotta get her love canal to river up and relax or you will not pass the cervix gate.
You are gently feeling for that one teensy spot past the cervix that does not feel like the others. You are feeling for a tiny bump on the uterine wall… about the size of a small pimple.
Quick, fast moves will cause her to upwardly contract the space around the object you are trying to reach and make that future heartbeat just about impossible to find.
No fingernails either.
Scratching her on the inside is not going to achieve what you want. It will provide the opposite reaction from your desired results.
Soft and slow will produce the relaxed nature both of you need to finish playing your exploration game that brings the buried treasure to light.
If she is pregnant and you got the spot, a tiny bit of blood (one drop) will be on your fingertip when you have finished the excavation. Within an hour or so, she should start her menstrual cycle.
If the finger trick doesn’t work… you aren’t doing it right or she isn’t pregnant.
If she is sure she is pregnant and the ept test confirms her position but your finger tactics didn’t work… you can try sex toys. However, I caution against this method.
Why? If you are inept at using your fingers… you will most likely just do damage with a toy that you have even less control over than your fingers.
Your next alternative is to use the same tool that knocked her up to remove the fetus, provided your length is 5.5” or longer.
Why? Masters and Johnson determined the vaginal canal extends to just under 5” during arousal.
You need to penetrate the uterus, past the vaginal canal, where the fetus is forming. When using a finger, the initial arousal is minimal. When using your member… hopefully you are both more aroused than by initial finger stimulation alone.
This recoupling of the dripping parts will probably require her to be on top and curved forward such that she can bite your erect nipples. You will both have to time your strokes for maximum penetration to pass the cervix to locate the item you want to dislodge.
May I boldly suggest not ejaculating inside again as there have been rare instances where a second egg was released and fertilized in this manner. Your sperm can live for up to three days in there and at the right time of the hormone cycle, a fallopian tube can release an egg in less than three days. An egg can also fertilize and get stuck in a fallopian tube.
Hopefully the creative juices for manually stimulating your partner get more use than for just the purpose of removal. I speak more to finger techniques in the foreplay letters.
So smile, stop panicking, let the politicians keep arguing Roe v Wade, while your fingers do some typing and swiping to make everyone involved sweat for fun for a little while.
I’m sure there is a good reason why this information is no longer common knowledge… while I don’t know the specific reasoning for hiding this information… I’m betting it has something to do with misery and money.
If one calculates all the people they know who were trapped into relationships (misery);
That if the trapped had freely known and used the common knowledge of our ancestors I listed here for you (money);
And that knowledge enabled those trapped individuals to choose different partners to mate with… how different would the world be today? (Freedom and happiness).
Try this poll… ask your parents and grandparents or random people over 40 the following question…
You were going to have children but knowing what you know now, do you wish you would have chosen a different partner to have those children with?
The answers you get might be surprising.
As always… if you learned something new of value, please share the Letters2Jamison with at least two friends. Knowledge is power.
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